conquer your nerves!


So you’ve arrived at the church, walked down the aisle/seen your loved one walking down the aisle, and the ceremony is finished.  You are now officially married and the most nerve wracking part of the day is over.  Or is it??!  That first dance is looming ominously on the other side of speeches, a meal and several glasses of wine.  And for many, the wine doesn’t help and the wobbly leg demon gradually grows throughout the day.

But nerves can be conquered.

For the occasion, I’ve prepared a short list of things that I think will help with the pre-dance nerves.


1.    Routines help.  One of the main things that couples say to me when I am teaching them their wedding dance is how nervous they are.   For many people, this nervousness seems to stem from them having no dance experience and feeling like they have ‘two left feet,’ (which of course is not true).  However, you’ve already begun to battle your lack of experience by learning a routine.  You are now experienced in this dance!  And if you’re anything like my husband, 8 months in to married life, you’ll still be performing the odd dance move across the living room floor.

2.    No one knows your routine except you, which means no one will know if you go wrong!

3.    You just got married and are having a moment with your new husband or wife.  Your wedding day goes so quickly, and sometimes it’s hard to get a moment alone together because there’s so much happening. Treasure these couple of minutes of dancing together; don’t let nerves get in the way of that.

4.    Practice.  Obviously the run up to your wedding is a manic one; if it’s anything like mine it will be anyway.  But practice does make perfect and it’s all about muscle memory.  Once your dance is in your head, you won’t have to think about the steps as much.

5.    Dance like no ones watching.  Admit it, we’ve all been home alone at some point and danced around the room like we’re Beyonce performing at Wembley, or dancing in a tight black vest like Patrick Swayze, seize this feeling of dancing freedom and use it!  (Please see inspirational pictures below.)


(enjoy the hairography like Beyonce)


patrick swayzee

(or alternatively, crawl on the floor like Patrick.)


6.    Breathe!  A vital ingredient to life, sure, but it will also help you calm your nerves.  Slow deep breathes from your diaphragm will make you feel calmer.

7.    Your friends and family are not there to judge, they’re there to support and enjoy your special day with you.  They will love your truly excellent dancing!

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(photo courtesy Babb Photo)


Of course you will still feel a little nervous.  Nerves are a good thing, it means you care about what you are about to do, but don’t let your nerves rule you and your dance.  Enjoy it!  Relish the moment that your guests will be watching you and thinking how wonderful you are dancing together and wishing that they could do the same with someone they love.

Thanks for reading!  Victoria x

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